Well we're just not sure what's going on. Life has gone on though there were days I was certain it couldn't. There is a bit of rhythm back to life. We have a house full of ladies here at Selah which amazingly is going well in spite of everything else. We are of the conviction that even in the face of death there are still people who need help and they could themselves be facing death if there isn't a hand reached out to help. So we have invited them in to our home and our lives and they are journeying with us in this process. They have been wonderful...praying and helping out while dad has been home. This thing called the body of Christ and community is an amazing machine! It works both ways--you give; you take and there can be a sense of harmony even in the midst of chaos.
And chaos there has been. Dad came home on hospice in May and mom and others cared for him there until just a few weeks ago when he was transferred back to the VA. He had developed blood clots in both lungs and both legs and was admitted and then transferred to the nursing care facility in St. Cloud where he continues to reside for now. What a ride that was. It was wonderful to have him home and he absolutely loved it...but it was very hard especially on mom. She nearly hurt herself on a few occasions trying to lift or shift him.
So we have journeyed on watching and waiting for what we assumed was an impending death. And, we have gone from being told dad has days to a week to having him actually improve in some ways. I feel like I need to land on the death side or the life side but yet I can't because dad's body just hasn't figured out what it wants to do. And that is okay...it really is. It is thrilling in so many ways :) And then I find myself wanting off of the emotional roller coaster (and feeling guilty for feeling that way). Maybe floating and riding is okay, because when I do get off the coaster...well then it is over. Not ready for that yet.
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